Friday Free For All

P.S. For some reason, this post is not allowing me to put spaces between the paragraphs. I apologize ahead of time for the incredibly loooong paragraphs!

As is true to my 'random' posts...this is long, all over the place, and a little bit senseless. But that is how my brain unloads, I'm afraid.

--We should find out something today about the offer we extended on the house with the boat in the yard. The last we heard, it was going to 'committee' at the end of this week. 'Committee' is when the bank looks at the offer, discusses it, and (we think) decides if they will accept it. It has been a month since we wrote the offer, so we are hoping to hear something soon.

Our realtor told us that if they do accept the offer, then we might close on the house in as soon as a week. This is exciting, but also a little bit stressful. We might be moving in a few weeks, or we might not. Do we pack? Do we plan? For now, we're just waiting. It does make things hard to plan, though. Becca's birthday is March 17, and I would like to have some kind of a party for her. It's hard to plan for it though, since we don't know where we'll be living, or even if we'll be moving that weekend.

--We are leaving tomorrow morning to go to my in-laws for the weekend. We were tossing around the idea of going, but we didn't want to miss church. Then we got a call from our realtor saying that they want to do an open house at this house we're renting on Sunday. From 12:30-2:30. That would mean the normal craziness of getting ready for church, with the added craziness of making sure the house is spotless before we go, and making the girls miss their naps after a busy morning at church. (They are both usually very tired after church).

That said, we decided to go to my husband's parents house. We were going to leave today after hubby gets out of work, but decided to wait until tomorrow morning so that we have another evening to get the house ready. Then there's less time for it to get messy tomorrow, if we leave first thing in the morning.

Hubby is looking into taking Monday morning off of work so that we can stay two nights. Happy sigh....

--What a rough week it has been! I know that I am not alone in this, based on the blogs that I read regularly. It seems that many of us are going through a rough time right now. For myself, I wonder if it's PMS, the weather (winter always makes me a little depressed), depression, or just me being human.

My attention has been drawn to these verses in Romans 7 many times this week. (From The Message)

16I can anticipate the response that is coming: "I know that all God's commands are spiritual, but I'm not. Isn't this also your experience?" Yes. I'm full of myself—after all, I've spent a long time in sin's prison. What I don't understand about myself is that I decide one way, but then I act another, doing things I absolutely despise. So if I can't be trusted to figure out what is best for myself and then do it, it becomes obvious that God's command is necessary.

17-20But I need something more! For if I know the law but still can't keep it, and if the power of sin within me keeps sabotaging my best intentions, I obviously need help! I realize that I don't have what it takes. I can will it, but I can't do it. I decide to do good, but I don't really do it; I decide not to do bad, but then I do it anyway. My decisions, such as they are, don't result in actions. Something has gone wrong deep within me and gets the better of me every time.

21-23It happens so regularly that it's predictable. The moment I decide to do good, sin is there to trip me up. I truly delight in God's commands, but it's pretty obvious that not all of me joins in that delight. Parts of me covertly rebel, and just when I least expect it, they take charge.

24I've tried everything and nothing helps. I'm at the end of my rope. Is there no one who can do anything for me? Isn't that the real question?

25The answer, thank God, is that Jesus Christ can and does. He acted to set things right in this life of contradictions where I want to serve God with all my heart and mind, but am pulled by the influence of sin to do something totally different.

These verses, it seems, could sum up my life perfectly right now. I am learning this week that I am my own worst enemy.

Isn't it funny how we are, as humans? Just a few days I wrote a post about gathering grace. How grace is available to us everyday, we just need to gather it. And yet, here I am, in need of grace, but not making the effort to gather it.

I could go on and on about what a rough week it has been for me, emotionally, but I don't think that would do any of us any good. I'm struggling. That's it. But there is hope! That is what I cling to.

--Is anybody else excited about this season of American Idol? I actually really like just about everyone I've seen in the top 24. There are a few that have the potential to make me cringe, but for the most part, they're good. I'm excited.

--Thank you to all of you who gave me encouragement and advice about getting up early. It has been a blessing to me. I have decided not to do cardio early in the morning, as I'm too tired and don't have the energy, but I do my Bible study in the morning, and have my prayer time. I might start doing Pilates or yoga in the morning...something to get my body going, but that doesn't require the energy that cardio does.

For know, I do my cardio during naptime. I'm hoping though, that as I get used to waking up early, I start to get more energy. We'll see.

--I don't know if I've mentioned it recently, but I really appreciate all of you who read my blog. And I appreciate your comments. While you are not the reason that I write this blog (it is an outlet for me and my thoughts), you have become a source of encouragement for me in this journey. The other day I was talking to my husband about my day, and was mentioning something I read on one of your blogs. He said "I wonder if your name is as constant in your bloggy friends homes as their names are in ours." He tries to keep up with you all, and it's funny.

Jennifer in Tokyo is easy to remember...she lives in Japan and has had 7 kids! And there's Sarah in California who has a connection to Campus Life. He of course knows Tara, as she is one of my best friends in 'real' life, and Earen, who helped make MOPS a great experience for me in CO. There are Jenni, Sarah, Sittintall, and Mari; my Michigan bloggy friends. While he knows each of them live in MI, he has a hard time separating them in his mind. There's Denise in CA who has now become 'the friend who made the cool tour of her house for her 100th post'. And Bethanne who will forever be known by the first comment I read of hers. She said her son wrote "I love beer" in church. When she asked him about it, he said "But I do love deer!" For whatever reason, this still cracks us up. (Love you Bethanne!) And there's Jennifer in GA who I refer to as "my girl in GA who makes me think of southern hospitality." He also listens patiently as I tell him my bloggy friends who are friends with each other touch my heart. Alana, Shelley, and Janelle...for whatever reason, I always have a mental block as to where you live. But I like to imagine what your get togethers must be like! And also Kristen at Idaho Mom. She's the friend who actually sent me an Advent book because she had an extra, and who is reading Anna Karenina with me.

You are all special to me in your own way. And you're all so much more than the short description my husband knows you by. And for those of you who read but don't comment, I appreciate you too!! (Although it would be fun to hear from you sometime!)

--My Valentine's evening was good. It was a little more dramatic than I would have liked it to be, thanks to my 'funk' (I was crying when my hubby walked in the door last night, and wasn't able to really stop until after the kids were in bed.) But even with the dramatics, it was a good night. I have a wonderful husband. It is because of him that I can understand more of how God loves me. And for that, I am blessed beyond measure.

--Happy Friday!! I'm praying that all of us who are in a 'funk' find our our way out soon!